Moving on After the Death of a Loved One: Ways to Grieve

If you recently lost someone you love, it is likely that you feel a sense of abandonment or unmanageable grief. Some people find that it is better to hide your feelings or shake them away, but the truth is, you need time to grieve and that is healthy.

If you suppress your feelings, your grief is likely to catch up with you later on in life.

This article will help you as you recover from the death of a loved one while also moving on with your life. Do not let losing someone damage your future.

Take charge of your life while also giving yourself time to mourn.

How to Grieve

Some people try bottle up their emotions about the loss, while others may be so overcome with grief that they forget that they are still alive. You want to find a balance between these two extremes when mourning over a loved one. Here are some simple things you can do to assure you are grieving healthily:

1. Cry: Crying is a healthy way to express your emotions. Don't hold back the tears if you are feeling significant pain.
2. Show Others You Care: If you are grieving, you may feel like there is nothing you care about more than the person in your life that has passed. A great way to grieve is to spend time with others you love and show that you care about them too. Fellowship is one of the greatest healers--don't forget that!
3. Keep a Journal: Even if you aren't much of a writer, keeping a journal is very helpful when attempting to express your emotions. When I'm angry, I start to write. It doesn't matter what the finished product is, or whether you ever look back on what you wrote. Writing helps you to get all of your thoughts out of your mind and on the paper.
4. Make Art: When I began my undergraduate studies, I wanted to pursue something called "Art Therapy." This type of therapy is used for young children or grieving people that need to express their emotions, but would rather not communicate with words. You can choose to make a scrapbook with photos of your loved one, or do an activity called "This is how I feel," where you create a piece of art that illustrates your inner thoughts and feelings. These activities are helpful to those who do not want to participate in traditional therapy.
5. See a Therapist: If you feel like the death was unexpected or troubling, you may want to speak with someone about your feelings. Do not see this as weak. Sometimes just talking to someone is the best medicine for a sad soul.
6. Write a Letter: If you feel like things between you and the loved one didn't end well, write them a letter. You may go as far as to stick it in a mailbox if you want. This is an effective way to rid yourself of any hard feelings.
7. Keep Yourself Happy: Don't let this death stop you in your tracks! Eat healthy food, exercise and do things that you love. You don't want to lock yourself in your room for days, missing out on the life you are lucky to still have.
8. Rearrange Your Room: Some people say that major life changes are not a solution to recovering after a loved one's death, but I find that rearranging the furniture in your home can help you start a new chapter in your life and leave the past behind you.
9. Create a Routine: You may be feeling lost without your loved one, but making rituals around their death can help you to grieve. Say a prayer for them every morning or simply create things for yourself each day like exercising to keep you active.
10. Do Things in Their Name: When a friend of mine passed away, we would always do things in his name. "This is for JJ," we'd say. By grieving, I don't mean forgetting your loved one. Make sure to do things in their name--things they'd like to do. I would often dedicate waves to lost ones while surfing.

Now that you have ten steps on how to move on after a loved one, you can make a difference in your life. Don't give up and put your future in danger. The goal is not to forget, but to move on in a healthy and positive way. Good luck and I'm sorry for your loss.